Hello my chocolate loving readers! I’m back with something that you guys might enjoy. I am always looking for things, ways, and opportunities to become a better person and something that I have been struggling with lately is complaining. I know everyone does it but there is one person that doesn’t do it, at least to my face. My father has never complained to me. Ever. And that is something that I truly value today.
Lately, I’ve been trying to figure out ways to start thinking more positive. I realized that I was letting other people dictate my mood a little too much. You might’ve heard the expression “protect your energy” and I never really understood what that meant until now.
A person’s energy, their mood, is more important than we may realize. It effects more than just that single person. Your mood is like a contagion; it’s infectious. It radiates and touches people around you.
I never want to be the person that ruins the mood with my stank attitude because I let someone or a situation rub me the wrong way. I’m on the path of unbothered…I’m sorry unbotheredt! Well at least I’m trying to be. I’m trying to appreciate more and complain less. I’m trying to be more like my father.
When I was growing up he was always hustling, always traveling to provide for our family. My parents never graduated from college. They weren’t engineers or doctors, they never had high paying jobs. They both had everyday jobs like working at Target, Sam’s Club, bank teller/clerk, and etc. My father was in the Army while simultaneously working at Sam’s Club. He was literally never not working.
He was stationed in Iraq and the surrounding areas for 2 years. He said the hardest part—aside from being away from family—was being on the edge 24/7. You could never let your guard down and you always had to be ready because anything could happen at any time. That was the hardest part: it was a 2-year-long stress test that weighed on him constantly. He had to sleep with his gun. How insane is that? To actually have to sleep with a gun like it’s your pillow? This made him value the little things more. And he especially learned to value life itself. Knowing life was short and that tomorrow is never promised. He really learned how to cherish the little things in life and it changed him drastically.
After his tours overseas—and being on edge 24/7—he came home to his 3 daughters, a newborn son, and a wife that was about to find out that she had stage 4 breast cancer. Now he was finally back to a somewhat normal routine. But it was all too familiar to his situation in Iraq; always on edge because he had no idea if death will keep her or take her. With my mother being diagnosed with stage four cancer, she wasn’t really allowed to work. So now my father had two jobs (Sam’s and running drill for the Army), with 4 kids, and a wife that was slowing dying. I rarely got to spend time with my father in the last year of my mother’s life. He was either working, at the hospital, or in the stands of our games. Afterwards, he would usually leave to either go to work or visit the hospital. In the end, he was there at the hospital when my mother passed away. I couldn’t even imagine being the one to find her not responding.
Shortly after she passed, I remember life was going by so quickly for us that it almost seemed like we weren’t able to regroup. One day I left the house super early to go to drill with him. He had also worked late the night before at his other job. When we arrived at his base he invited me in but I didn’t want to be a distraction and I was too afraid to go inside so I insisted on staying in the car. I will never forget that day because I realized how hard he was working to get us by and doing whatever he had to for us to be successful. After being at drill all morning he came out, got into the car, and drove me to my softball tournament. I don’t remember how far it was, but after nearly 24 hours of nonstop work, he still spent all day at the softball field to watch me play.
I can go on and on about the many sacrifices he made for me and my family. But what is most important is his positive attitude through it all. The man who helped carry us through this life with so many nearly impassable roadblocks in his path. But he always seems to find the good in anything that was put in his way. After all of that, not once have I ever heard that man complain.
As a kid growing up under those circumstances, it was so important to have someone level headed like him to show us how to find the good in life. With all the chaos, we needed somebody to keep us grounded. Like I said before, your energy is contagious, it effects those around you in ways you don’t realize. And my father’s ability to keep his head up and keep moving forward is what kept all of his kids moving forward. And it’s something that I do my best to emulate now.
I wanted to give you guys a slice of his background. Because compared to him, I have it made. I truly believe he would’ve wished for my troubles that I have today. I often get caught up in my own world but as soon as I snap out of it I’m reminded of the things that I do have in life that I’m immensely thankful for. He’s more than just my father. He’s my hero.
P.S. Appreciate More & Complain Less
olivia dyan 